(adapted from articles on www.daughters.com)
LISTEN TO YOUR DAUGHTER. Focus on what is really important–what your daughter thinks, believes, feels, dreams and does –rather than how she looks. Remember that you have a profound influence on how your daughter views herself. When you value your daughter for her true self, you give her confidence to use her talents in the world.
ENCOURAGE HER STRENGTH AND CELEBRATE HER SAVVY. Help her learn to recognize, resist and overcome barriers. help her develop her strengths to achieve her goals, help other people and help herself. help her be what Girls Incorporated calls Strong, Smart and Bold!
RESPECT HER UNIQUENESS, URGE HER TO LOVE HER BODY AND WHO SHE IS. Tell and show your daughter that you love her for who she is and see her as a whole person, capable of anything. Remember 1) growing girls need to eat often and healthy; 2) dieting doesn’t work, and 3) she has her body for what it can do, not how it looks.
REMEMBER YOU’RE HER ROLE MODEL. Your daughter is likely to choose a life partner who acts like you and shares your values. So, treat her and the other women in your life the way you want her
GET HER PLAYING SPORTS AND BEING PHYSICALLY ACTIVE. Start young to play catch, tag, jump rope, basketball, Frisbee, hockey, soccer, or just take walks…you name it! I help her learn the great things her body can do. Physically active girls are less likely to get pregnant, drop out of school, or put up with abuse. The most physically active girls have fathers who are active with them!
GET INVOLVED IN MY DAUGHTER’S SCHOOL. I volunteer, chaperone, read to her class. I ask questions, like: Does her school use media literacy and body image awareness programs? Does it tolerate sexual harassment of boys or girls? Do more boys take advanced math and science classes and if so, why? (California teacher Doug Kirkpatrick’s girl students didn’t seem interested in science, so he changed his methods and their participation soared!) Are at least half the student leaders girls?
GET INVOLVED IN MY DAUGHTER’S ACTIVITIES. I volunteer to drive, coach, direct a play, teach a class—anything! I demand equality. Texas mortgage officer and volunteer basketball coach Dave Chapman was so appalled by the gym his 9-year-old daughter’s team had to use, he fought to open the modern “boy’s” gym to the girls’ team. He succeeded. Dads make a difference!
HELP MAKE THE WORLD BETTER FOR GIRLS. This world holds dangers for our daughters. But over-protection doesnÕt work, and it tells my daughter that I donÕt trust her! Instead, I work with other parents to demand an end to violence against females, media sexualization of girls, pornography, advertisers making billions feeding on our daughters’ insecurities, and all “boys are better than girls” attitudes.
TAKE MY DAUGHTER TO WORK WITH ME. I participate in April’s Take Our Daughters & Sons to Work Day and make sure my business participates. I show her how I pay bills and manage money. My daughter will have a job and pay rent some day, so I will introduce her to the world of work and finances!
SUPPORT POSITIVE ALTERNATIVE MEDIA FOR GIRLS. Our family watches programs that portray smart savvy girls. We get healthy girl-edited magazines like New Moon and visit online girl-run “’zines” and websites. I won’t just condemn what’s bad; I’ll also support and use media that support my daughter!
LEARN FROM OTHER FATHERS. Together, we fathers have reams of experience, expertise and encouragement to share – so let’s learn from each other. I use tools like the newsletter Daughters: For Parents of Girls
(www.daughters.com).
